These classes seemed unique to BYU, like they were part of all the crazy Provo culture that nobody with a brain would be a part of. But I'm pretty sure other schools had classes in teaching - just a hunch. I think I was afraid. I was worried somebody would see me sitting in one of these classes without a wedding ring on. I was worried somebody would see me leaving the class, or doing my homework. I was worried that I wouldn't have any friends in those classes because those people were different than me, they were they types who could and did get married.
Truth is, I've spent at least 6 years trying to learn things that these women already knew. Children were in my future, but I didn't plan very well for it. I assumed that anyone could get pregnant and be a Mom. I remember reading every book I could get my hands on while I was pregnant, about pregnancy and a growing fetus. When we took Kate home from the hospital I realized I hadn't read a single thing about raising a child. Silly Andrea.
I'm not knocking myself down. I loved what I studied, and I would probably do a lot of the same things given another chance. But I would be far less critical of the choices others were making and I think I would have taken some marriage/parenting related classes and probably would have understood and enjoyed children more. Isn't that a major benefit of education?
Luckily Spencer was so distracted by my beauty that he didn't notice all the rest! Seriously, can I request that I go back to almost 24 in heaven? Oh wait, I didn't know anything then that would help me now. Never mind.
11 comments:
oh my gosh dre. first of all i love this post because i know EXACTLY what you mean. second of all, from an outside perspective it really is ridiculous for you to worry about this. As you know, you are one of my favorite role model moms and your kids are always amazingly cute and smart and well behaved when i see them - thanks in no small part to you and your mothering skills.
And yet every time I am with you I am impressed with your calm and purposeful parenting and how you help your kids to understand important life lessons even at their young ages. Every time we spend time with you I wish I could align my parenting skills a little more along the line that yours are following. You're doing a fine job probably because you are so conscientious of how you are doing.
My goodness, you are gorgeous. GORGEOUS!
I have to say, I took all those classes, but I feel like a way worse mother than you in pretty much every way. Every time I'm around you and your kids I'm so impressed with how you know them, how you speak softly but they still listen, how they behave so well in public. You are an incredible mother. So more power to you for studying what you wanted to study, because you rock all around.
The one class I feel like I really benefited from was Marriage Prep. I wasn't dating anyone or planning to get married and most of the people in that class were engaged or married, but I loved what I learned and to this day use lots of the principles we talked about in that class in my marriage.
purposeful is a great way to describe you!
Also, we can't do everything all at once. Those women are probably wishing that they took art and design classes.
You're doing great with what you've got. And you've got a helluva lot.
i take lessons from you every time i read your blog. i think classes would have limited your awesomeness. :)
great post, andrea! love the photo too :)
I know I just stalk you from afar through your blog but I would love to one day be the wonderful mother that you are. I can feel the love that you have for your children by what you write and when it comes down to it isn't that what really matters. As long as the motivation is love we find a way to make the rest happen :) But if you have any questions I have three sisters that did take those classes and they are wonderful tanks of knowledge for me to drink from :)
I wonder how many guys/girls don't take those classes for the same or similar reasons. Clearly you've hit on a point many people are interested in. Too bad this can't be in the a sidebar in the class schedule options book. And that picture is sooo good!
another comment...is that picture from your wedding lunch thing? You guys still look just as ravishing today so I wasn't sure when it was taken.
y'all are too kind. i didn't mean this as a post about my lack of parenting skills - more about my prejudices as an ignorant college student. but it is so helpful to know that at least sometimes i've got it together, but also that you all have my back. i REALLY appreciate it.
*picture is from our pre-wedding dinner. kelly's memory is amazing.
You sure are beautiful, what a pair you two make. Haha I know exactly what you mean; having said that, I'm on a pretty tight schedule and not interested in any of those classes :) But I had a somewhat similar experience about categorizing/limiting ourselves, I need to call you and share.
Post a Comment